Monday, February 14, 2011

Valentine's Day 2011
Kiss my Giant-Sized MAN-THING

While, in years past, I have presented deep, introspective gazes into the love-life of Doctor Stephen Strange and his numerous love-interests (which can be found at the following links HERE and HERE or even the "Clea Loves Sex" series:  HERE), today I only have time for a "quickie".

And as such, I think that this year I'll focus on a few images of some sweet love for the MAN-THING.
(now won't THAT be taken out of context by Google surfers)

Story by Marv Wolfman, Artwork by Liam Sharp 
from 'Marvel Shadows and Light' # 2
Man-Thing is sensitive enough to "cuddle" afterward.


It has been hinted in 'Thunderbolts' # 150 that Man-Thing has a "crush" on Moonstone, but as of this time, aside from a longing glance, no scene of outward affection has really been shown.
Story by Jeff Parker, art by Kev Walker from Thunderbolts # 150
Love-lights are in his eyes.


While wracking my brain to come up with a good scene of someone (preferably female) kissing MAN-THING, I did indeed come across a few, but the few instances I came across were either poorly staged (i.e; too many figures in a panel, or too much dialogue, or cropped awkwardly), such as this example - one of the earliest of my remembrances of someone actually WANTING to hug the Man-Thing.

 Story by Chris Claremont, artwork by Gene Colan
from 'Doctor Strange ; Master of the Mystic Arts' # 41.
Man-Thing about to get "thanked" by several people in togas.


Some embraces were too vague, with only subtle emotions on display...

Story by  Paul Hornschemeier, Art by Mark Texiera, from 'Tomb of Terror' # 1
 A tear-stained cheek, a gentle caress and a sad farewell.


...OR some instances where the "embrace" was inappropriate (one great scene where Man-Thing and his former wife/lover Ellen Brandt were locked in a death kiss, with her being absorbed into his mass).

Story by Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa, artwork by Nic Klein
from 'Dead of Night ; Featuring Man-Thing' # 4
Man-Thing loves her... to death!
Many relationships are filled with hostility that barely hides deeply-seeded love.


Displays of manly love or "bro-mance" are alright, such as between Man-Thing and members of the Thunderbolts (as shown in this old post HERE) and this one between Man-Thing and Frank Castle (aka; the Punisher - aka; FrankenCastle).

 Story by Rick Remender, art by Tony Moore and Mike Hawthorne
from 'Punisher/FrankenCastle' # 13.


Even a "big brother" type of caring has been seen, as was the protective friendship between Manny and Franklin Richards.

Story by Scott Lobdell, art by Chris Bachalo from 'Generation X' # 25.

Story by Peter David, Art by Salvador Larocca from 'Heroes Reborn : The Return' # 1
No NAMBLA. jokes, please. That shit's just WRONG!
(oddly enough, in either case, the "M" should stand for "monster")


Platonic man-love has been seen, such as the one time when Quasar (Wendel Vaughan) gave Manny a quick kiss to the top of his head.

Story by Marc Gruenwald, art by Greg Capullo from 'Quasar' # 31
Man-on-Man-Thing love.


Much like the scene from Doctor Strange above, there was even a scene where multiple people were lavishing attentions upon Man-Thing.
Jennifer Kale (unfortunately in one of the few instances where she isn't wearing her metal bikini) and a few other heroes put together the various "blown-up" pieces of Man-Thing, reassembling him, and seemingly are giving him a full frontal massage to "revive" him.

Story by Marc Gruenwald, Art by Andy Smith from 'Quasar' # 50
They just keep rubbing that Man-Thing until he spurts some of his "Nexus".


Heck, I'm even open minded about trans-gender love... such as this WOMAN-THING / SUMP-THING union. (It's a weird story. But Man-Thing is a woman in it, and Swamp Thing is the Sump-Thing... uh... you'd need to go back and read Cerebus # 23- 25 before reading this issue. )

story and art by Dave Sim, from Cerebus # 82.
The "real" (unseen) "sex scene" is in Cerebus # 25.
y'know.. just nevermind.
The only person who will be turned on by this is Mike Sterling!


Of course, at the end of the day, THIS is STILL my favorite image of Man-Thing lovin'!

Story by Jeff Parker, Art by Colleen Coover
from ' X-MEN : FIRST CLASS : FINALS' # 3

So, there ya have it.
And remember...
Whomever knows LOVE... YEARNS for the Touch of the MAN-THING!

May your favorite Man-Thing give and receive all the love that it deserves.



David Charles Bitterbaum said...

I really like Man Thing so it is good to see him get some affection now and then.

A.L. Baroza said...

Wait, so Man-Thing got to make out with Abby Arcane in that first image? She gets around, doesn't she?

~P~ said...


Silly... that's not Abby Arcane.
What? There can only be one hot, weirdo chick who likes to hang out naked in swamps, hugging walking shrubbery?

But... and I WAS going to include it, Abby Arcane DOES indeed give Man-Thing some affection in a spoof story in Marvel's "WHAT THE...?" # 6.

I didn't include it because the quality of the art and coloring was so murky that nothing could save it.

Maybe next year, I'll try to tweak the pages in photoshop.


Shlomo Ben Hungstien said...

now that's what i call a balls out posting title!!! good job.

Shlomo Ben Hungstien said...

that panel of Wendell (Quasar) kissing Man-Thing is actually quite touching. Wendell Vaughn was a great character i always found him easy to relate to and very funny much in the same way as Peter Parker. it's too bad he died in the Annihilation Wave.

Randomnerd said...

Oh, this is wonderful! Good show! Bravo!

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